THE MAYONNAISE JAR AND COFFEE

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar... and the coffee...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
 
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things-your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions-things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else-the small stuff.  "If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your wife out to dinner. Maybe even play another 18. There's always time to clean the house and fix the disposal."

Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled.  "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend." Please share this with someone you care about.

No hablo español
 
A new missionary recruit went to Venezuela for the first time.  He was struggling with the language and didn't understand a whole lot of what was going on.  Intending to visit one of the local churches, he got lost, but eventually got back on track and found the place.  Having arrived late, the church was already packed.  The only pew left was the one on the front row.

So as not to make a fool of himself, he decided to pick someone out of the crowd to imitate.  He chose to follow the man sitting next to him on the front pew.  As they sang, the man clapped his hands, so the missionary recruit clapped too.  When the man stood up to pray, the missionary recruit stood up too.  When the man sat down, he sat down.

When the man held the cup and bread for the Lord's Supper, he held the cup and bread.  During the preaching, the recruit didn't understand a thing.  He just sat there and tried to look just like that man in the front pew.  Then he perceived that the preacher was giving announcements.  People clapped, so he looked to see if the man was clapping.  He was, and so the recruit clapped too.

Then the preacher said some words that he didn't understand and he saw the man next to him stand up.  So he stood up too.  Suddenly a hush fell over the entire congregation.  A few people gasped.  He looked around and saw that nobody else was standing.  So he sat down.

After the service ended, the preacher stood at the door shaking the hands of those who were leaving.  When the missionary recruit stretched out his hand to greet the preacher, the preacher said, in English: "I take it you don't speak Spanish."

The missionary recruit replied: "No I don't.  It's that obvious?"

"Well yes," said the preacher, "I announced that the Acosta family had a newborn baby boy and would the proud father please stand up." 

Multiply Blessed

If you woke up this morning
with more health than illness,
you are more blessed than the
million who won't survive the week.
 
If you have never experienced
the danger of battle,
the loneliness of imprisonment,
the agony of torture or
the pangs of starvation,
you are ahead of 20 million people around the world.
 
If you attend a church meeting
without fear of harassment,
arrest, torture, or death,
you are more blessed than almost
three billion people in the world.
 
If you have food in your refrigerator,
clothes on your back, a roof over
your head and a place to sleep,
you are richer than 75% of this world.
 
If you have money in the bank,
in your wallet, and spare change
in a dish someplace, you are among the top
8% of the world's wealthy.
 
If your parents are still married and
alive, you are very rare,
especially in the United States.
 
If you hold up your head with a smile on
your face and are truly thankful,
you are blessed because the majority can,
but most do not.
 
If you can hold someone's hand,
hug them or even touch them on the shoulder,
you are blessed because you can
offer God's healing touch.
 
If you can read this message,
you are more blessed than over
two billion people in the world
that cannot read anything at all.
 
You are so blessed in ways
you may never even know.

Making Sense...
 

Older now...

Another year has passed
and we're all a little older.
Last summer felt hotter
and winter seems much colder.

I rack my brain for happy thoughts,
to put down on my pad,
But lots of things that come to mind
that make me kind of sad.

There was a time not long ago
when life was quite a blast.
Now I fully understand
about "Living in the Past"

We used to go to weddings,
football games and lunches.
Now we go to funeral homes,
and after-funeral brunches.

We used to have hangovers,
from parties that were gay.
Now we suffer body aches
and while the night away.

We used to go out dining,
and couldn't get our fill.
Now we ask for doggie bags,
come home and take a pill.

We used to often travel
to places near and far.
Now we get sore rears
from riding in the car.

We used to go out shopping
for new clothing at the Mall
But, now we never bother...
all the sizes are too small.

We used to go to nightclubs
and drink a little booze.
Now we stay at home at night
and watch the evening news.

That, my friend is how life is,
and now my tale is told.
So, enjoy each day and live it up...
before you're too old!